Best Layed Plans.......

After moving here one of the things I wanted was to get a dog.  Dave wanted a dog with hair rather than fur because we knew how much a dog could shed and hardwood floors show every bit of it.  Why did I want a dog?  When I was gone a dog could make sure he got out of the house almost every day.  Like so many plans we did not ever consider that he would die first.  Now it is me that Quincy gets out.  Sometimes when there are other people here a caretaker or friend will take him.  Yesterday I was in a funk when caregiver Cindy said it is not raining and it is not that cold, lets take Quincy for a walk.  My first reaction was I don't want to.  However she had said the w word and he was ready to go.  How could I look at the big brown eyes and say no?  Quincy was doing exactly what I wanted him to do, only I was the recipient.  So we went.  My pity party was still determined to take over. Most of the brightly colored leaves had fallen and the bare trees fit with my mood. However Cindy was not at the party and continued to see bright red bushes and yellows that looked like the sun.  I had sent a text to Todd that we were going for a walk and he found us to finish the walk.  Between the fresh air and two people talking about how nice it was I couldn't mope any more. I do still wish life had gone as planned.  Dave would have had fun teaching Walker to drive and maybe even given him the car.  He also really enjoyed working with kids in the higher-level math classes. With all three boys he could help with projects and have lots of fun.  I know the boys can learn from me but I can not interact with them as he would have.